Personal thots April 1, 2006

This morning has been hard. I have been back from Africa for 3 days now. I got up early and started looking through my 24 rolls of pictures from my trip. Picking out the best ones to put together to show people.

Eating my Cheerios brought tears to my eyes as I thot of the children in Northern Uganda living in the huts and not having anything to eat. Flies cover their dirty faces. Where most children are playing and having fun, these children spend each day in search for food and water, walking each night to shelters to sleep so the rebels can’t abduct them. What kind of living hell they experience each day. What is worse is that this is all they know. They were born in war and live it each day of their miserable lives.

Where do I put this? Where do I file this information? Sleep is difficult. When I close my eyes the haunting faces appear to me. Pleading for help, and I feel so helpless. My heart hurts, my mind swims with thoughts, faces, smells, filth, poverty, hopelessness.

I wonder about Daniel, a young boy I met in Sudan. Will he be safe from the LRA (Lord’s Resistance Army) tonight or will they again come to his village and steal, burn huts and kill? All he wants is to go to school, but that is even impossible since he has no money.

I think if I pour out my thots on paper, then maybe I can go through the day without this aching in my soul. Somewhere to dump all this information. Pass it onto others so I don’t have to carry it alone. But the burden on my shoulders grows heavier with each passing day. No relief insight.

Would I trade my experience in Africa? Not for all the money in the world! God has allowed me to see what most people will never see. He has allowed me to walk in their shoes even if only for a day, so I can remember, so I can know what they go through, so I can tell others. Lord, help me to know what to do! How to help these precious people whom you love and died for.

While we were in Gulu, (northern Uganda) a woman asked “Where is God?” I had no answer. But later I thought of how we are the “body” of Christ, we are Christ in physical form to the world around us. And in Gulu the body of Christ is not there, the church is not there, believers are NOT THERE!!! So in answer to her question: “Where is God?” I am sorry but He is NOT IN GULU!!! Because we, his body is not there!